Finding purpose and meaning in life is a goal for many of us.
Fulfillment is about being fully alive! It is the state of fully expressing who we are and doing what is right for us. People describe it as wholeness, satisfaction, or a sense of rightness. It sounds simple, but it takes tremendous courage and commitment on the part of our clients to choose the path of a fulfilling life.
As a Coach, I am helping my clients find more fulfillment in their lives. One of my clients, let’s name him Robert, reached out to me because he has been in his job for 20+ years. He still likes it, but something is feeling “off.” He mentioned that a sense of meaning and purpose is missing, and he needs to change something in his life. In his current situation, he is also often in a lousy mood and impatient with his partner, family members, and colleagues around him.
Fulfillment Coaching, one of the three core principles in Co-Active, is a great starting point here. To get clarity and find direction in life, the best starting point is to coach your client on the following three topics:
2) Life Purpose
3) Leader Within & Allies
“It’s not hard to make decisions once you know what your values are.” Roy E. Disney.
Values are the qualities of a life fully lived from the inside out. They define the person you want to be and provide a standard for evaluating your actions. Helping clients discover and clarify their values allows them to navigate their inner compass and the decisions they make on their journey. When our clients live according to their values, they will feel “resonance,” a deep inner feeling of knowing what is right for them.
I worked with Robert on his values, and some powerful questions which I asked were the following:
- Imagine a significant moment in your life. How did it feel?
- What do you admire from your role model/hero?
- What are the three most important values for you?
- What upsets you?
“Finding and claiming a life purpose will give you a powerful sense of direction in your life. The truth you will find in the life purpose statement can make you virtually unstoppable.” Henry & Karen Kimsey-House
The second way to navigate your inner compass and get a deep sense of “this is it” in your life is to discover your “life purpose.”
We are all born with a life purpose or a mission, and if you follow your heart and do things according to your purpose in life, you will likely feel more fulfilled.
Life Purpose is the north star, which gives us a sense of direction.
To get more clarity about Roberts’s life, I asked:
- What gets you out of bed with a smile every day?
- What are you here to do?
- Why are you here?
- What is the nature of your contribution to the world?
In addition, we did the Life purpose visualization (one of the Co-Active tools), revealing what is meaningful to him in his job.
The self is a complex constellation of many different voices, many different internal ‘selves.’ Consciously personifying specific parts of the self allows us to access whichever energy, aspect, or facet of ourselves is most useful in any given moment. Your Leader Within is your inner authority who leads by example, standing in full self-acceptance and claiming full self-authority of your life’s journey. Your Inner Leader is an expression of who you are now and who you are becoming. In addition, you might want to explore Allies that help you as specialists in certain situations.
I invited Robert to imagine a boardroom for an organization called “Your Life.”
The idea was to fill this boardroom with the people he wanted in his company.
Leader Within, the ‘CEO of the boardroom’: What are three qualities you want to have? -> smart, experienced, take decisions
Allies: What are three qualities you want to have? -> Fun, Patience, Challenger, Philosopher, Sales guy
What was the outcome of the coaching for Robert?
After our fulfillment sessions, Robert could reconnect to his inner compass, which gave him a clear focus and direction for his future. He started to search for a more meaningful job, and his being with others switched from impatient to more loving.
Working with your clients on their values, life purpose, and inner leader & allies will give your clients a direction in life where they can feel more fulfilled and energized.
In the Co-Active training you will learn how to work with visualization, for finding your client’s Inner Leader, which can be really helpful for your client and provides great tools for you as a coach.
About the author
Matthias Hombauer is a Co-Active Coach and former Molecular Biologist. He loves working with creative minds who want to bring their vision and dreams alive. He lives with his two kids (Mia and Noa) and his wife in Vienna, Austria.